Critique by Lazarus Chernik, Creative Director for Echo-X:
The drawing is sensitive, the face and expression are beautiful, but the coloring has flattened out the inherent depth from the line drawing.
The saluting hand gets completely lost in the helmet. The muscular structure of her belly has become round and... not buff. The coloring of her right arm (hers, not the viewers) brings it further forward in space than her chest. The shorts are also unfinished. The cuff color matches her belly color, while her leg color matches her short color - which gives the optical illusion that she is wearing string garters and stockings. The shorts should be shaded to add structure and depth.
The off-center placement of the buckle also hurts the structure.
The BG is loose and whimsical. Nothing to say about that.
I think both arms look short too. Maybe the intent was to push both elbows back into space, as if they were bent away from the viewer, but that almost never looks right even when attempted by a master. Notice how many masters avoid that composition because of that.
I'm sorry to say the neck is missing and her right shoulder (the one on the left) is also missing. The arm connects directly to the clavicle. Her head floats above her body. Her left hand is much smaller than the right. Her left fingers are missing - they should be at least posed so they don't look hidden or forgotten.
The chain is a nice touch - but without the shorts being shaded the effect of it swinging between her legs isn't working.
Not bad at all, I'm just being specific about what you can improve on it.